was diagnosed with a mood disorder aged 24, and have been taking antidepressants on and off ever since. I’m grateful that my medication keeps the emotional thunderstorms at bay, but what I’m not thankful for are the side-effects, which include sexual dysfunction.
Friends tell me to try Chinese medicine or Viagra, but they’re missing the point: I can get an erection, no problem, but when it comes to sex, I’m simply not interested. I could have the entire Chippendales troupe stripping in my living room and I would just want them to move out of the way so I could watch Game Of Thrones.
My sex life on meds is like the difference between drinking a freshly opened can of Coke and one that’s been on the counter for two days – flat. I’ve tried other medications that supposedly don’t have this side‑effect, but they’re all the same. It’s like trying to drive a car with an empty petrol tank.
Like many sufferers, I will occasionally convince myself that I’m fine and will stop taking my pills. That allows me to experience the pleasure of sex again; to have emotions and feel human. But I always crash eventually and have to begrudgingly go back on my medication.
It could be worse. Perhaps I should get a T-shirt printed that reads: “I’d rather be happy than horny.” The thing is, when I’m feeling especially lonely, I don’t always know if that’s true.
www.theguardian.com
